Wanita Indonesia


Woman vs Shoes

By Caring Lova on November 9, 2011

Fibriyani Elastria

I was a 30 y.o woman who’s happily married and was 8 weeks pregnant when suddenly we found out that I can’t keep my pregnancy and had to end up in miscarriage surgery, around 2 years ago.


It wasn’t that sudden though, the doctor had given this clear watchout 2 days before I finally had to let my baby go.. Trying to put my logic up front, I thought I was ready.. I knew it’s for the best for everyone, even for the baby.. I thought I’d be OK.. And I had all the support I need from my hubby and both of our families. My hubby was there for me all the time, and I found my parents, parents in laws, my brother & sister, and sister in law around me by the time I woke up from my unconsciousness. Everyone was telling me that things are gonna be just fine with all the endless effort to cheer me up.. Despite the imperfect pregnancy, it was a perfect situation for a woman who has to go through such moment in her life.. And I think I was one of the luckiest women on earth in that circumstance!


But then, my tendency of being over-analyzed started to work again..


Until today, 2 years after my surgery.. I can’t stop thinking..

We know that when a woman has to go through such moment in life, it’s not just a matter of the physical pain they have to go through, but it’s also about emotional devastation for losing the living creature inside their womb! Having said that, I can’t imagine how it feels being in such situation, not because of any medical reason but simply because it’s an unplanned pregnancy since you’re not even legally married yet! Pregnancy occurred simply out of lust and abortion is chosen due to inability to take the consequences, even worse, the man that got you pregnant decided not to take the responsibility for whatever reasons he may have.. Which (in reality) mainly would be as simple as “I’m just not that into u and I don’t wanna marry u nor have baby with u“..


I can’t imagine why a single woman with intellectualism and dignity would be willing to get into that stupid choice.

-          when you say “I’m pregnant“, you got this numb shocked expression instead of a loving smile and warm hug from your partner and families.

-          even when u decided not to tell your parents and take abortion as key solution, you’d have to go alone.. Best case is your partner will accompany you, but one of the reason is to make sure that you get rid of the baby.. a.s.a.p! No such loving family support and attention that you’ll get.. And somehow you also think you don’t deserve it.

-          when you woke up from your unconsciousness, you’d wake up alone.. Then you go home as if it’s just another ordinary day.. You will try hard to hide the fact that you just gone through one big thing in your life, and loss one life out of your tummy.. You can’t make the world gives extra care and attention to you just to make you feel a lil’ bit better with your loss.. Because all you know is when they found out, you’d feel even worse about yourself and couldn’t face the pitiful look people gives to you, as if they’re saying “what a pathetic stupid girl she is“..


I’m not trying to be all judgemental here because I know things may get more complicated than above, however, I believe women have the capability to CHOOSE – which means, you can choose to say NO since the first time. I believe it’s very easy just to make a guy wanting to get you to bed.. Even when they don’t really want u, a little teasing will work. So, yes – don’t feel proud of it because it’s not about how tempting u are, but it’s just men’s basic need! However, when they really care, love and RESPECT you.. No matter how much they want it, they will listen when you say NO.. And they will stop.. And in fact, they will care, love and respect u even more.. That IF you also have the capability in choosing the right-good man since the beginning..


Think of it like a woman and shoes..

When a woman find a nice pair of shoes on sale, they would most likely buy it even though they don’t really need it.. Or even when the model is kinda similar to whatever she might already have. The reason she buys it simply because it’s DISCOUNTED, not because she really wants or needs it. And when it comes to her wedding day, for sure she will buy a BRAND NEW shoes that she really likes, because obviously the discounted shoes doesn’t deserve to be wore in such special moment.. either it doesn’t have the right style, or colour, or simply most women wouldn’t dream to wear an old-used-discounted shoes on their wedding day…


Makes sense?


Same thing like a man and woman… The man would probably “buy and use” the woman since she was on sale.. but don’t be angry when he decided to choose a brand new person on his wedding day..


So, do u think u wanna be that Discounted Shoes???

I know I don’t!!


About Caring Lova

Artikel Woman vs Shoes

Komentar Kamu?

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>